I miss her terribly still. I know that feeling will never go away, but I don't know that I want it to. If I still miss her, then I know she was real. I know that sounds weird, but I want her memory to still be alive when I have kids, so that they will know about their grandmother, and so that they will know that she would have loved and spoiled them to no end.
This picture was taken about nine months before my mom passed away. She was 48 years old when she had a pulmonary embolism. It was beyond unexpected. There were no real signs, other than she could breath very well. She thought she had a cold though, and that it was just congestion. The ME said that the cause was being overweight; something she had struggled with most of her life.
This past year has been a learning experience for my whole family. I have learned who in my family are the strong ones; who can help the rest carry on. I've learned that my family leans on me more than ever knew they would. I've learned who in my family takes advantage of situations, and who in my family will be there to stop them. I've learned things about my mom that I never knew; and maybe never wanted to know.
I cannot say that a year has made it easier; just different.
I love you mom. I always will. I will continue to do what I think will make you proud. I will continue to try and guide my sisters to do the same. I will help dad be strong and move along.
1 comments:
It's been 13 years for me, and I still miss my mom terribly. I think I've said it to you before, but I'll say it again. You never get over it, the pain just eases as the years go by. You learn to live in the 'new normal', but you never stop missing her. And there will be days when you miss her more than others - even 13 years down the road. *hugs*
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